Decade by decade, humankind progresses, and leaves scraps of tradition behind it, no longer wanted. A century ago, people had a much simpler way of regarding relationships. You’d meet a potential suitor, get married, and just like that, you’d either learn to love each other and live a happy, steady and prosperous life together, or you’d be stuck in a dysfunctional, bleak relationship, two strangers and a wedding, but no love to be found. Things are done differently today, and democracy has made its way to even our hearts and our bedrooms. We have the freedom of choosing for ourselves, and most people benefit from this system, but very often, a couple will rush things, and get trapped in tedious, repetitive lives, afraid to break away from the shackles of a bad marriage, and once more swim into the stream of a bachelor life. If you think you’re a person prone to staying in a broken relationship, these suggestions, written by generations of people who wish they knew then what they know now might be of tremendous help.
Don’t run from an imperfect match – Experience is seldom bad for you. If you are doubtful about a potential love interest, but you are not receiving necessarily bad vibes from the person, try your luck with them. How many people have you met that turned out to be exactly what you thought they’d be the first time you laid eyes on them? Not very many, most likely. The experience counts for more than something. Besides, if it ain’t a fit, you can always give ‘em a slip.
Try living with someone – This is a great way to understand the beats of your own drum. Are you a people person? How much personal space do you need? Some of us are just not cut out for incessant human contact, and that’s perfectly fine. You have to know yourself and what you want out of a partner first, or risk chasing away someone you could have had it all with, if only you know from the start that you need to spend an hour a day alone and undisturbed. This doesn’t limit itself to just romantic partners – everybody should try living with a roommate before they decide to go solo.
Spend some time in isolation – On the previous note, knowing if you are an extrovert is just the half of it. Introduce yourself to the other side of the coin, figure out if you’re a lone wolf, or merely an occasional introvert, because you might simply be suffering from mood swings, and are in need of a balance in life. People – can’t live with ‘em, can’t stand life without ‘em.
Use contraception – a piece of advice so often repeated that it loses its meaning. But this is the most important thing you can do for yourself and for your partner can’t stress enough how important this is. Oh, how many marriages failed because he knocked her up. It’s not the most elegant wording, but neither is getting pregnant by accident, and then deciding you want to keep the baby, oblivious to the fact that you’re not synchronized as a couple, let alone parents. We live in the age of technology and progressive medicine, so why do we accept things we didn’t ask for in the first place? A loving family is a great place to introduce a child, safe and warm and organized. Two people in lust cannot even compare. By using contraception, one ensures that, apart from staying disease-free, they will avoid the infamous ‘abortion is murder’ talk. So stick to condoms and be the master of your own fate!
All these sound so obvious, kind of basic, really, but it is the most apparent things that actually get overlooked, so think long and hard before taking the final step towards marriage. Romance is so much better when you take the path of your life together, and with confidence in your step.